Won't let go
by lucidreams
Summary: Takes place after The Nearly Great Escape from the Jack series and tells of what Goldilocks experienced in the memory hole. Contains spoilers for those who haven't read The Nearly Great Escape.
1. Chapter 1

**Title**: Won't let go.

**Author:** lucidreams

**Fandom:** Fables

**Characters:** Goldilocks

**Rating:** R for language

**Warnings:** Contains swearing and spoilers.

**Synopsis:** Takes place after _The (Nearly) Great Escape_ from the Jack series and tells of what Goldilocks experienced in the memory hole. Part one.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Fables, Goldilocks or anything worth suing for.

_"And there she hangs her head, to find herself faded, a shadow of what she once was. She said 'How long have I been sleeping and why do I feel so old? Why do I feel so cold? My heart is saying one thing but my body won't let go'". _

_**Mary**_ by Sarah McLachlan

A low female body floats in the ocean. She's been here for days certainly, weeks perhaps, and maybe even years if she lets her madness direct her sense of time. Whoever said being popular was a good thing should be dragged out into the street and shot between the eyes, she decided. It is because Goldilocks is so popular that she's in this shitty ocean.

If someone had told her, if her mother had warned her, that Goldilocks would survive an axe to the back of the head, she would have laughed her ass off. That popularity bullshit about gaining more powers through the number of people who knew or believed in your story was preposterous.

_Tell that to the fishies eating your feet, Goldie dear._

The axe to the head was one thing but surely she wasn't so popular to survive the truck hitting her body at full force, right? No such luck. In fact, evening drowning seemed to have little affect on the blond anarchist.

_But I'm not drowning! This isn't real, it's just a memory!_ Goldilocks screams silently to herself. She'd scream outloud if she could, if her mouth would just move. She's been in the memory hole ever since Mr. Revise hauled her out of the well. Her stomach turns as she grits her teeth and remembers Jack.

_Screw Snow bitch and that fucking dog of hers, Jack will be the first to fall!_ With only her memories to haunt her in this dark, deep cell, Goldilocks tries to distract herself with plans of revenge. Such thoughts are usually overwhelmed by the memory hole but her anger at Jack burns bright, bright enough to keep her sane. Well, as sane Goldie ever was.

The drowning memories are the worst. Those weeks where she couldn't move, couldn't breath and simply begged for a death that would not come. She's hated water ever since. Can't go near any that's deep and it took her while to get use to showering and bathing again. Always felt like water was in her lungs whenever she climbed into the bathtub. _Water in my lungs now_, a frantic whisper starts. _Can't breath, can't swim--_ Her slender body trashes on the floor, trying to cough up invisible water, just enough to get some air, to scream for help. _Help, please! Help!_ A pitiful sight on the floor, she's drowning in a virtually empty room. The security camera fades in and out of her vision. _Jesus, can't they see what's happening to me? I'm dying--_

If only, part of her wishes bitterly. To give up and finally let go of her body but those damn Mundy's won't let her.

_But you could! _Goldie's eyes finally focus on the camera in pleading matter. They're watching her, Mr. Revise's librarian's Paige and Robin. _Fucking bitches! You could end this!_ They wouldn't she knows. Goldilocks is damn near impossible to kill and even if they did do it, what then? Another girl would just take her place and they'd have to go look for her.

No, better to keep torturing Goldie. Push her into new heights of madness.

She struggles, catching some air and breaking the spell over her body and mind for a few minutes. _They're not going to let me go_. Goldie sits up and takes a few shuddering breaths, she's going have to get out of here on her own. _Can't be too difficult_, she lies to herself. _If that moron Jack can do, so can I._

How long had she been in the hole? Just a few hours could feel like days so Goldie had no idea. _They'll have to feed me at some point, won't they? Make my move then before I get too weak. _ The petite blond groaned as the room came into focus. It was a horrible plan, something Jack would try, she'd never get it to work. _Yet he would, that goddamn-- _She bit her lip, a dark scowl on her otherwise pretty face.

Jack, just like every other man to ever screw her over. She'd have to plan something extra special to do to him.

Then, just like that, the memory hole grabs on to that memory and takes Goldilocks back were she least wants to be.


	2. Chapter 2

From the ocean to the bedroom, Goldilocks was surprised to find herself in bed with Jack Horner. Again. Jesus, it had been a mistake the first time, was she doomed to repeat it?

Well, at least this was better then being stuck in the ocean and drowning repeatedly. A loud snore came from the body next to her. "Better by how much?" she muttered out loud as she glanced at the blond man next to her. Handsome in a shabby, skeety way. Bane of her existence. Why hadn't she just smothered him when she had the chance?

Another truly disgusting snore came from his pompous face when Goldie decided she had enough and shoved Jack out of bed with a thud. "What the hell?" Jack cried, sitting up on the floor, naked as the day he was born and glaring at Goldie. "What did you do that for?"

"Because you're a disgusting excuse for the male species and this is just a memory", she declared as she climbed off the bed. "Now where are my clothes? You were so eager to get me back into them the first time we fooled around".

"Yeah, no wonder with the shitty attitude you have", Jack groaned when he started fumbling for his own clothes. "And what insane drug trip are you on now Goldie? What is this memory shit you're on about?"

"You. You're a memory. I'm stuck in the memory hole, thanks to you and this is all..." She waved her hands as she talked, "--This is all just re-hashed memories".

"Rrrright". Jack's eyebrows had shot up on his forehead. "Knew I shouldn't have banged a psychotic blond--"

"I am not psychotic!" Goldie suddenly screamed, turning on Jack. Her bra in her hand was thrown at Jack and caught him square on the jaw. How dare that prick laugh at her?! They were the crazy ones. Snow White, Jack, that damn wolf, the leaders of the oppressive fables. If it wasn't for the likes of those city fables, Goldie could have led the farm fables in their revolution. "Snow White shouldn't have stuck her nose in where it didn't belong!"

"Blah, blah, blah..you keep telling yourself that sweetheart. Now weren't you leaving?" Jack finally had his boxers on and was heading for the kitchen. Probably to get himself a beer Goldie decided as she retrieved her bra from the floor and followed him. After all, what else was there to do?

"I would if I could Jack, believe me".

"What's stopping you?"

Goldie sighed angrily. "Is it just in one ear and out the other with you? I just told you, this isn't real".

"And you're not psychotic?" Jack replied in disbelief.

"God, talking to you is like talking to a tree. No, I am not psychotic. This is a memory, I am trapped in the memory hole where I have to relive a bunch a shitty memories, such as drowning repeatedly, getting axes to the head...sleeping with you", Goldie finished with crossed arms. Jack was helping himself to a beer and gave her a grin.

"See, it's not all bad".


	3. Chapter 3

"You have to be the most--" Goldie started but Jack interrupted her with his hand raised.

"So you'd rather be back in the ocean then?" The look he was giving her made Goldie feel like an idiot. It also made her aware of how undressed she was. Why was _that _bothering her? Goldie wasn't some prude, ashamed of her body, and Jack had seen her naked enough times these past weeks. _Yeah, that was before the jerk shoved you down a well_. Remembering that frightening experience, Goldie had the sudden urge to grab that beer bottle and twist the broken shards into Jack's arrogant face. Unaware of the possible threat, her memory of Jack kept talking. "If you don't want to be here then leave. That's what I plan on doing", Jack said with a swig of beer.

"It's what you did", Goldie replied. "You escaped and stuck me in a well along the way".

"Oh yeah. Well, I'm sure I had a reason for that", he flippantly replied. "So how did I make my great escape?" He had a big grin across across his face that made Jack look like a little boy. For a moment Goldie almost smiled before she remembered what an asshole this guy was.

"Off the backs of the other oppressed prisoners, of course", Goldie snapped. "I still can't believe a moron like you escaped this place".

"Well, why don't you try following my inspiring example then, Goldie?" Jack chuckled as he took a seat. Now that they were talking about him (his favorite subject) Jack didn't seem so anxious to get rid of Goldilocks.

"How? I, unlike you, don't have anyone to help me", Goldie replied as she moved back into the bedroom to search for more clothes. She was sick of standing around half-naked talking to Jack. Especially with the way he kept leering at her. _Turning me into a sexual object. Typical chauvinist pig!_ Secretly Goldie didn't mind the attention but she had ideals to represent here.

"Are you sure? What about those hot sisters? Robin and Paige gotta know their way around and out of this joint". Goldie sighed as she dressed and came back out into the kitchen.

"You're really clueless, aren't you? They're working for Revise. They hate the fables. Why would they help me?"

"Because they're ambitious. Plus I think they want to be the boss ladies. I definitely got that 'dominant' vibe off them. Five bucks they're into all that freaky black leather shit". Jack looked thoughtful, he was probably imagining himself in a three-way with the sisters, Goldie decided in a disgusted thought. But the twerp had a point. Goldie had overhead things from the sisters, before she was put into the hole. About how Revise didn't trust them, how they'd have to get into his good graces again, how they resented the boss.

_If they knew more about the Fables then they'd be able to catch more_, Goldie remembered them saying. The sisters knew an awful lot already but Goldie was willing to bet they didn't know the ins and outs of Fabletown or the Farm. _And I'm willing to bet they'd be interested in making a trade for such information_, Goldie silently added. _What do you know, Jack was actually useful for once_.

"Thanks Jack, you've just given me an idea", Goldie commented out loud with a wicked grin crossing her face.

"Always glad to help", Jack graciously replied as he started to fade away along with the rest of his kitchen. Goldie soon found herself alone again in the dark cell. Alone, focused, and waiting...


End file.
